Teaching Children Effective Interpersonal Skills
The path to a successful life goes through the learning of effective interpersonal skills. Be it career, relationships or navigating the world in general, learning effective interpersonal skills plays a very crucial role in supporting a child to grow into a well-rounded individual.
In their formative years, children start forming groups, associating with each other, creating boundaries, making friends and the like. Their ego formation starts at a relatively young age of 2 to 4. This helps them recognise themselves as separate from others.
The process of relating to others vis-a-vis themselves is a crucial milestone in the development of the ego and resulting interpersonal skills. Every child has the desire to be part of a community, belong to a group and be associated with certain people.
Identity formation and association with other individuals is an important aspect of interpersonal skills.
There are five main areas in which interpersonal skills can be measured:
- Communication – It is the ability to listen carefully to others and express emotions, ideas and thoughts clearly.
- Empathy – The ability to understand and share others’ feelings while being compassionate and kind.
- Conflict Resolution – It is the ability to resolve disagreements and arguments in a peaceful and respectful way.
- Collaboration – The ability to work with others as part of a team in a complimentary and cooperative manner while aiming to achieve a common goal through shared values.
- Assertiveness – The ability to put forward one’s opinions, needs and demands in a respectful and confident way.
It is imperative to teach children interpersonal skills for various reasons.
The four most important reasons are:
- Career Growth
- Healthy Relationships
- Emotional Wellbeing
- Academic Success
These four pillars combined form the basic structure of life. The more strong and balanced these areas are, the more flourished the individual is going to be.
Careers in today’s world demand strong communication and teamwork skills. One has to collaborate with others and be in constant touch and complementarity to achieve shared goals. Employers therefore value employees who have strong interpersonal skills.
Careers today are also quite diversified, with a lot of new doors opening up for youngsters, like radio jockey, acting, music, and film-making all of which require effective communication and other interpersonal skills.
Individuals who are able to create healthy relationships with others in their personal and professional lives are often more successful and fulfilled. Having healthy, authentic and constructive relationships is key to growth in life.
From developing strong bonds with family members to having successful life partnerships, interpersonal skills play a vital role in shaping an individual’s life.
This automatically has a strong influence on the emotional well-being of an individual. People who have good bonds with friends, family and peers are able to maintain healthy mental space.
It is the ability to regularise and manage one’s emotions and recognise and respond to others’ emotions in the right manner. Emotional well-being is also important for one’s physical well-being.
Emotional intelligence fosters emotional resilience, empathy, confidence and overall well-being.
How to Teach Interpersonal Skills to Children:
Be a Role Model
Children follow the lead. What they see as normal behaviour by adults, they mimic. So, make sure to behave the way you want your children to behave. Be respectful towards your associates, and each other as parents and practice empathy. Communicate effectively and resolve conflicts in a constructive manner. Be polite in your dealings with your children and let them speak their minds.
Carefully listen to them while they express their feelings and thoughts and respond respectfully and firmly. This will provide them with correct feedback. Whether they can continue with a certain action or behaviour or not should be communicated to them in a polite, firm and non-transgressive manner.
This will teach them assertiveness, boundaries, respect, discussion and co-habiting with other people in a hierarchical group setting.
The Role of Family
Family is usually the first group that children become part of, therefore, it is imperative that you provide a solid and well-structured family environment to teach your children strong interpersonal skills.
Try to create a family environment where people are positively listened to and answered in a well-thought-out and polite manner.
To foster self-confidence and self-esteem in children, try to not interfere with their decision-making process. Let them decide for themselves and take affirmative action on their ideas.
They should learn from their mistakes and know that you are there to help them when they need it. By creating healthy boundaries between you and your children, you are giving them a great deal of independence and confidence. This in turn will shape their interpersonal skills in a positive way under your guidance.
When you empathise with your children and teach various interpersonal skills by practising them yourself, your children are most likely to develop those same qualities in a seamless way.